Inspirations: August 05... August 08... and New Prosperity... Shanice... Dorinda...
Jeremiah 29:11. James 1:3-4, Psalm 139, Romans 8, Hebrews 11, Psalm 5
Hmmm, it's almost the end of this month. It was also about this time 3 years ago when God delivered me from the lowest of low points in my life. I don't know how many of you have ever wanted to commit suicide but when you get to that point, you know the only way you can come out is through the goodness of God.
Today, I got some interesting news from one of my buddies. In a nutshell some seasons are over... or the way I look at it... a chapter has been read... analyzed and completed. And now its time to move on to the next chapter of life.
And while that sounds easy to do; trust and believe, it is indeed a challenge. For one, you are stepping out of your "norm" into unknown territory. Also, you have to make a sacrifice to let go of things, desires and folks. In a lot of cases it's issues or folks that mean you no good, but in some cases you do ask God... Uhhh??? You want me to give up what?... who???
But here's the funny thing, even when you initially let go, Satan also tries to present new spirits and demons to try to distract and take over you. But eventually, you finally get to a point when your spirit man lines up with God and finally say... "enough is enough... God you are for me and Satan... I rebuke you in the name of Jesus Christ."
Now people say what they want about me now, cuz I'ma big Dorinda fan (I let 'em talk). But I don't like Dorinda because of her status. She caught my attention in 2006 when I check out some youtube clips and I finally learned about the story behind her song, "I'm Still Here." To think that someone with all the fame and success would want to committ suicide. Her reason; a church hurt. And while I have not experienced this; I can only imagine that in her mind, she was at her lowest of lows and felt like what's left???
I guess that's why I appreciate her a lil' more than that other Clark Sisters (this does not take anything from Twinkie, Jacky or Karen... they all are true instruments from God... so chill), cuz we both have been on the verge of letting it all go. But the fact that Dorinda was able to share her story really helped me to deal with the fact that I actually wanted to kill myself.
But back to the subject.
Sometimes it is very easy to close a chapter in life; while with others, it can be like hell on earth. But in either case, once you are able to close the chapter... you feel like a burden has been lifted. For me it was not only the suicide, but more so what lead up to that point... being talked about in school... not being able to go to my parents, because it seem like their problems were more important... or my sisters because it seem like they were so much older and more important... myself being nonchalant about everything with no drive to live life.
But I thank God for James 1:3-4... I thank Him for reminding me through dreams of my dad (God rest his soul), the trials of Hurricane Katrina... and the new temple that God is creating in me. For all these things, as well as the past, are working together for my good according to the Love God has for me and the Plan He has laid out. And not only do these things work in my favor, but because I choose to be a willing able vessel, the light shining in me will be a blessing from God to many. I am truly thankful for God using me; as messy as I can be, He still chooses me.
And for the rest of you out there... I don't know... it may be a church hurt... or a sickness or a betrayal... or family hurts or drugs or prostitution... whatever...
Just know that GOD LOVES YOU... With each day GOD'S LOVE FOR YOU NEVER FAILS. He will lead you through every storm... test... and all the enemy, this world and yes even yourself tries to throw at you.
THOUGHT: When I think about the fact that had I gone through with what I wanted to do 3 years ago. How would my family go on? How would Jermell and Gloria go on? I woulda never met Charles and Colin. All the writings that God has used me to share... who's soul would have been lost if I had did what I wanted? The eternal damnation I would have experienced...
But God...
When you are able to testify about what was meant to destroy you... that is when you are truly freed from the chains of that situation and you finally complete the chapter.
Below are two songs... The first is by one of my favorite artists, Shanice. While this song, I think all of us can relate to on many levels, I found myself looking at it from a spiritual level. Call me crazy, but this song has definitely gotten me through past relationships and help me to grown in relationship with God.
The second song is from another favorite, Dorinda Clark Cole. There are couple I could'a chose; I'm Still Here... Yesterday... I Got A Reason... You Can't Take My Joy... and yes... even Take It Back (that's another blog)... But I chose this song because for one... it's a mime presentation and the words mean so much to me now. Had I heard this song a year ago I don't think they would have the same affect as they do now...
Enjoy and be blessed this holiday weekend.